Every good person should read the Bible, and follow its teachings, like:
- You should cut off the hand of a woman if she grabs a man by the private parts, albeit if the men are fighting.
- Telling slaves to not only follow their masters without question but to do so even if the master is perverse.
- You can sell your daughter as a slave, but not only for the 6 years as a man is, but for life, and if she can’t sexually please the man she’s sold to, he can sell her again.
- If you divorce your wife, you’re an adulterer, and if you marry a divorced wife, you’re an adulterer.
- Cannibalism is okay if you’re eating your son.
- If your penis is deformed, misshapen, or otherwise damaged, you are a sinner if you enter a church.
- Unless it is circumcised, which is encouraged
- If you’re a girl, and you have a sister, and if you find that there are few people on the planet remaining, you can have sex with your father by first getting him drunk and having sex with him.
- Isn’t that rape?
- Looking at a woman with desire is equivalent to having sex with her.
- You can screw your sister.
- Women can’t have authority over men.
- Genocide is okay if they pray differently or live on a piece of land that you want.
- Women should obey their husbands without question.
- You should kill your son if God feels like it.
This is not even including the excerpts where the Bible tells you that you can beat your slaves if they annoy you, but make sure that they survive, and those parts where you can kill your son with stones if he’s disobedient, and those verses that say you can rape a woman if she gets a bit uppity.
Real life lessons there.
